060717 "How to Make Your Twinkie More Appealing."

Recipes even MEN can follow.
AND you already thought your Twinkie was just too delicious?
Just try this, using a microwave oven. 

I discovered/invented these delightful recipes while trying to be resourceful with ingredients at hand.

Recipe #1 - Kahlua Twinkie:
1) Place your Twinkie in a small cereal bowl.
2) SLOWLY pour about 1+ jigger of Kahlua over your Twinkie.
3) Place your Twinkie in the oven for approximately 10.3 seconds until warm or the cream filling starts to melt and ooze out. Make sure your Twinkie soaks up all the Kahlua.
4) Enjoy.

It tastes just like an expensive gourmet dessert at a very expensive restaurant.
MMmmmmm.
 
Recipe #2 - Roasted Caramel banana:
How to make your Banana more appealing.

1) Build a campfire.
2) Fork your banana.
3) Roast in the fire until foamy juices are oozing out with gusto. (You can’t keep it in the fire too long and burn it, better too long in the fire than not long enough).
4) Place your hot banana on a plate and use a sharp knife to make a “trap door” on top so the banana skin forms a “dish”,
5) Open the banana “door” from top to bottom. The banana should be quite mushy. With a spoon, spread the banana mush so it forms a grove from top to bottom.
6) Pour in caramel sauce (or hot fudge, Kahlua, etc).
7) Enjoy
(You can cheat and put your banana in the microwave for 3+ minutes with the same results).

It tastes just like an expensive gourmet dessert at a very expensive restaurant. MMmmmmm.

More handy cooking tips for Men (by Bert, Master Chef)
1) Your burnt soup is done when the smoke alarm goes off…. Add ½ cup of water.

2) Want formal dining? Put a place-mat in the bottom of the sink before eating.

3) Remove the paper from the can of Dinty Moore Stew before placing it on the burner. (Note: Do not put out the fire with certain salad dressings, they burn too, I discovered).

4) Thaw out frozen pizza and TV dinners before eating, they’re not as crunchy that way. (Better yet, Heat them first if you have time).

5) Don’t have any croutons? Popcorn makes a great substitute.

6) Catsup makes almost anything taste ok.

7) Place paper towels under hamburger to soak up the grease. Throw away hamburger, eat paper towel (less calories). Add catsup for more taste.

8) Nat reminded me... SPAM... , My Favorite. Spam can be used in so many ways, and if in a hurry, can chew on it right out of the can. Use your imagination and be creative with Spam. (It's Not just food anymore)

9) any suggestions?